Christy and the Drunk

Christy waited tables at a hip little bistro a few blocks from
her apartment.  Though she loved her neighborhood, she always
prepared for the unexpected.

One night, one of the diners got a little out of hand. She could
put up with rude customers, and she could even tolerate patrons
who had a little too much to drink. She and her boss agreed that
anyone who tried to lay hands on her or on any of the wait staff
would end up enjoying the rest of their meal "to go."

So her boss ejected a customer who looked like a rumpled college
professor after he tried to pinch Christy's bottom. The guy
created a huge stink, but the customers applauded when he fell
down the steps and landed on the sidewalk with a thud.

Later that night, after Christy banked out and counted her tip
money, she headed back down the street to her place. She thought
she heard footsteps behind her, but saw nobody when she swung
around.

Another block away from the restaurant, she thought she heard a
trash can rattle. Still, she couldn't see anyone in the shadows.

Only a few steps away from her building's front door, Christy
heard someone sneeze. She whipped around to see the drunken
customer from earlier that night.

He lunged at her, shouting, "I'll show you!"

Instead of bolting for the door - she wouldn't have made it in
time, anyway - she pulled out her keys. Instead of a usual
keychain, Christy carries a Mace Pepper Baton. It's small enough
to fit in a purse, and durable enough to inflict pain on an
attacker.

As the drunken patron grabbed for her hair, Christy ducked down
and slammed the Pepper Baton across his kneecap. Wincing in pain,
he buckled over and made another swipe at her. She retaliated by
holding onto the baton and swinging her keys against his face.

Stumbling, the attacker made one last grab. Christy pointed the
baton at him, unleashing its secret weapon - a blast of
debilitating pepper spray.

Christy's attacker crouched on the sidewalk while she dialed
9-1-1 on her cell phone.

"Next time," Christy said, "stick to what's on the menu."